However, the physical love, as well as friendship, we can say one and the same: to ensure that it is true, it should be free. But freedom - is not a whim. Love requires a certain commitment to a more or less long term. However, only the individual has the right, in accordance with their will, to act one way or another, that is, to perform its obligations or abandon them. The feeling can be free, provided that it does not depend on any without him the right attitude when experiencing it a person can be sincere and not afraid of anything. Conjugal love is, by contrast, involves the suppression of all the gusts and constant lies. Above all, it prevents the couple really get to know each other. Casual proximity does not lead to understanding nor sympathy. Her husband too much respect for his wife to be interested in her psychology breaks. He do so, he would have recognized her some independence, which could be inconvenient and even dangerous. Whether she feels pleasure in bed? Did she really loves her husband? Is she gladly submits to him? He prefers not to ask yourself these questions, they even seem to him indecent. His wife - "a decent woman," and she by definition virtuous, loyal, true, pure, and happy to think so, as it is necessary to think. Once a patient, thanking his friends, relatives and doctors said his young wife, who for six months did not depart from his bed: "You I do not thank you performed your duty." None of the above qualities of the husband does not consider the merit of his wife, because they are guaranteed by the company and are a necessary part of the institution of marriage. He does not realize that his wife is not gone from the pages of one of the novels Bonalda what it is - a living man of flesh and blood. He takes for granted its rigorous devotion to duty. He does not think that she might have to fight against temptations and sometimes she can not stand that, be that as it may, her patience, purity and decency are not easy to her. And he does not want to know her dreams, fantasies, longing, that is, of the emotional atmosphere in which takes her life. In his work "Eve" Chardon describes a husband who for years kept a diary of family life. This man is very delicate talks about his wife, but he speaks of it only as a wife, as she appears to him, and did not see it as a free individual. He struck, when suddenly learns that she does not love him and was going to leave him. How much has been said about the disappointment of naive and honest men, we see female insidiousness with which the terror of husbands plays Bernstein discover that their life girlfriend - a thief, cruel boy, traitor. They bravely carry the blow, but still not the author manages to make the reader believe in their strength and generosity. They seem to us crude loons, devoid of sensitivity and goodwill. Men accused women in secrecy, but a narcissistic fools are so constantly let deceive ourselves. The woman is destined to be immoral because it requires the moral role of supernatural beings - and that is a strong woman, and an excellent mother, and the standard of integrity, etc. As soon as she begins to think, to dream, to sleep, something to desire, breathe.. not following the rules, it destroys the ideal that men have created. That is why many women allow themselves to "be themselves" only in the absence of her husband. In turn, the woman also does not know her husband. She thinks that she knows his true form as he sees in everyday life, but above all a man defines his work, then, that he is engaged in the world, among other men. Refuse to take into account that its essence - his business, his transcendence - so distort its very nature. "A woman marries a poet - Elisa says - but by becoming his wife, she notes in the first place, that he forgets to flush the toilet." 1 But her husband nevertheless remains a poet, and if the wife is not interested in his work, she knows it is worse than any personally with them unknown to the reader. Often, however, this is not her fault. Due to lack of experience and culture she does not understand her husband, does not understand anything in its affairs, it is not possible to share his thoughts, despite the fact that they have for him is much more important than the monotonous repetitive daily. Occasionally, in exceptional cases, a woman becomes a real friend of her husband, discussing his plans with him, give him advice, and participates in its work. But the idea of ??that so she can rise to personal creativity, is illusory.